Here’s How Often Married People in Philly Have Sex

Here’s how often married couples have sex in Philadelphia.

We asked, they answered. Here are the results of our Philadelphia marriage survey.

Do you keep your finances separate?

33% — Yes
67% — No

What’s the hardest thing about marriage?

“Always having to consider how every decision or action affects another person. It can be a great comfort to be so closely tethered to someone, but sometimes I miss full independence.”

“Dealing with each other’s families.”

“Having periods at the same time.”

“Feeling the other’s ups and downs as your own. It can be exhausting to have to double your emotional output.”

What do you argue about the most?

31% — Finances
17% — Sex
16% — Parenting
36% — Other

What do you wish you’d known about marriage before tying the knot?

“How ridiculously fast it goes. It’s like having children. The days can be long, but the years are short.”

“That it doesn’t save you shit on taxes.”

“That it’s not necessary. That it adds more pressure than it’s worth. That it’s okay to be happy and unmarried even if no one else understands.”

“That you’ll compare yourself to other married couples constantly.”

How often do you have sex?

47% — A few times a month
37% — 1-2 times per week
9% — We never have sex
6% — 3-4 times per week
1% — 5+ times per week

What’s the most surprising thing you learned about your spouse during your marriage?

“That he was a pornography addict, was having an affair, and spent many hours at strip clubs.”

“His insecurities about me making more money.”

“He is really never going to be cool with my cat.”

“That he was a Truther. We’d been together for years when we got married; it wasn’t until 2012, during the Obama reelection campaign, that I discovered he had strong feelings about the 9/11 attack based on conspiracy theories.”

Published as a part of a “Marriage Stories” feature in the April 2020 issue of Philadelphia magazine.